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  1. #1
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    Question 'Twas the Night Before Smithmas!

    'Twas the night before Smithmas, and all through the temple,
    Not a cumelon was creeping, or a tapir, (for ex-emple!)
    The garments were hung out to dry in the air,
    But fortunately for us, we have two extra pairs.

    The children were stashed at Gramma's homestead,
    While Mom and Pop got dunked once again for the dead!
    And Mom in her veil, and I in my old bakers' cap,
    Had just about finished another endowment wrap!

    When beyond the temple grounds I heard a big clatter
    Even sprang from my seat to see about the chatter;
    To the pentagram window I flew like an eagle,
    Peered out to see some Christians - they were legal!

    The icky tall towers cast a shadow below
    But still I could see someone I did know.
    For what to unbelieving eyes should appear,
    But my eldest daughter and hubby, my greatest fear!

    With signs held high, walking about and about
    And above the din, I could even hear them shout!
    Rapidly, quickly, their sentences came,
    And they shouted each "profit", yes even by name!

    "Now Smith, now Young, now Kimball and Monson!
    Come on Woodruff, and Taylor, and every man's son!
    To the top of the temple, to the top of the spire!
    Each man can explain why he did conspire"!

    "Joseph Lied"! They shouted as the leaves began to fly,
    We've met the Tanners, and discovered the lies!
    So come out and face us, bring the whole crew!
    Hinckley and "Fielding," and McConkie, too!

    And then in a while, I perceived on the roof!
    That Moroni was laughing, banging his hoof!
    And as I turned back to see my dear wife,
    I saw her run and cry, "getting out with my life."

    The wiggling hand dropped from the eerie veil,
    And soon the whole crowd ran out, 'cept the frail!
    Some hobbled along, they didn't look back,
    'Til there was just me, and Satan in black!

    Old Slew Foot's eyes flashed, as he called after the flee-ers
    "Ha, you fools won't escape, you can't be "believers."
    You see, you've covenanted Joe Smith to obey,
    If you don't, why then fools, I'll rule the day!

    But the stump of one sign still stood on it's pole,
    And it's words could be seen, even thru the cold!
    "Joseph has lied, no first vision , he's a boaster!
    Moronoi never existed, and Smith's an impostor!

    The Christians rejoiced as the Mormons streamed out,
    And I couldn't help hearing them put up a shout!
    With a smile and a prayer, they welcomed the lost,
    And told them the Gospel, Good News in the frost!

    And they spoke God's Word, going straight to their work,
    Filling hearts with hope, and healing the hurt!
    They p***ed out Bibles, and with tears in their eyes,
    Praised the God of the Universe, who vanquishes lies!

    And with hope's spark in my heart, I ran out to see,
    My family who cared to love, love mother and me!
    And I heard them exclaim, as they prayed so intense!
    "Good bye Joseph Smith, and to Satan, get thee hence"!
    Last edited by Apologette; 12-16-2013 at 03:36 PM.
    Oath formerly taken by Mormons promising not to reveal secret Mormon temple rituals: "Should we do so, we agree to have our breasts cut open and our hearts and vitals torn from our bodies and given to the birds of the air and the beasts of the field."

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